Just a little pain...

This is just me penning down a few things about my life... You don't have to appreciate this in any way. But if you feel like telling me ''Its okay, things'll be fine,'' I welcome you to do so. I have gone out with my boyfriend for six months now. We're really in love. I did not believe in love as such... because in a country like India, such ideas were not welcome in earlier times. I guess I was just born with the same thought. Until I fell in love myself. It is very complicated... My relationship... The guy I am with happens to be my ex's cousin. My present boyfriend's ex is with my ex! COMPLEX isn't it?? Okay! lets see.. My present boyfriend is 23... and my ex is 12. 23 was going out with 14. But, 12 cheated on me with 14. and I dumped him. 23 got to know, and 23 sought me out. His first intention was to seek revenge on 12. But instead of that, 23 fell in love with me. He cannot let go no matter how hard he tries. A few weeks ago, 23 came to see me on my b'day. He met me and we had a blast. The next day, everything went wrong. I got so upset, I walked off.. STORMED off more likely. And I left him bleeding on the floor [not literally. more in the gothic sense. I just left him hurt and raw] Well, do I seem cruel? not really. He had it coming. He's made me cry so often and its really not nice being with someone who makes you cry is it?? So my friends counselled me, and I realized I didn't need him.. That day, I walked off and told him before leaving that things were completely over. And I went to hang out with my friends since its not wise to be alone when you're so depressed. But 23 came running after me, and we sat and spoke. 23 and his friend, against me and my friends. My friends questioned and counter questioned him.. I feel bad now, but his ego was deflated. and he begged me to come back. I saw it then, the pain I'd felt everytime I'd cried. I saw it then, the sorrow he felt without me. And for some reason, my sorrow engulfed me, and I fell back into his charm. I agreed. I came back to him. But now, things are not okay. We went a little too far for my comfort, when i visited him in his city. [don't think dirty] And I think he doesn't need me anymore. But he still loves me. I need him now. Will he be there for me?? I really am hurt.